Skip to content

She crawled.

February 26, 2013

image_1360250272828014I didn’t know her.  But, I knew her story.

Her name was Lori.  She was the friend of my friend, Sallie.

Last year, Sallie shared Lori’s story with some of us from church.  She was asking that we pray for her situation.

She was battling inflammatory breast cancer, and she had been told that she would not live much longer.  She had a husband and two small children under the age of seven.

When I heard this, I was definitely cut to the heart.  Just thinking about her situation made me ill.  Those two children of hers would soon lose their mom.  I put myself in Lori’s shoes and imagined what it might be like to tell my sweet kids that I would soon be gone.  Just the thought of that conversation occurring brought tears to my eyes.  No child should have to live without his/her mother or father.

I also found out from Sallie that Lori was doing some amazing things as she waited for her life here on earth to come to a close.  She spent much of her time writing letters and putting together videos and photos for her children to have once she was gone.  I was told that she wrote letters for all of the major life events that were to come for her children.  Birthdays, graduations, weddings, etc.  She put together letters and cards for all of those special days and tucked them away for her husband to give to them when the appropriate time rolled around.

How amazing is that?  What a wonderful treasure those items will be to her children.

Sallie also shared that Lori’s spirit throughout her entire battle had been amazing.  She said that her attitude and her outlook were so inspiring.  She said that her faith in Jesus through it all was unwavering.

I continually received updates from Sallie about Lori’s situation.  The updates continued to worsen.  Shortly after Christmas, Sallie shared that it looked as though Lori was nearing the end.

Then, on a cold January day, Lori let go of this life and went to be with the Lord.

Shortly before she died, Sallie shared these words about her friend:

“I don’t even have the words today. Praying for a beautiful friend, Lori, as she prepares to enter the kingdom of heaven today after one grueling battle with inflammatory breast cancer. She has battled with so much courage and GRACE. The grace she has shown is astounding. I’ve learned so much from you, Lori. Praying for peace and comfort for your husband and your sweet young kiddos, as well as the rest of your family. You deserve to rest in the arms of your Lord and dance on the streets that are golden.”

After the funeral, I approached Sallie and asked her how Lori’s family was holding up.  She said they were doing okay.  Then, she shared a moment from the funeral that I will never forget.

Lori was a physician.  One of her fellow physicians (who was also a close friend) gave the eulogy.  At one point during her message, she shared a very touching story.

She shared that Lori absolutely loved putting her children to bed each night.  She cherished that time.  But, as she neared the end, she found that she could no longer climb the stairs to make it up to their bedrooms.

Her solution to this problem?

She crawled.

She crawled up the stairs so that she could get to their bedrooms and do one of the things that she cherished most in life.

That one simple act speaks volumes to me about the love and devotion that this young mother had for her two little children.

If you are a young mother and you are reading this right now, I pray that you will etch that scene into your memory.  That scene of a woman struggling to crawl up the stairs to be with her children.

How many times have you sped through the bedtime routine with your children?  How many times have you dreaded brushing teeth and putting pajamas on squirming (and sometimes uncooperative) bodies?  How many times have you purposefully whipped through a short storybook and given quick kisses on foreheads just before turning out the lights? How many times have you dreaded the process and hurried through it, as a result?  How many times have you just tried to survive through it rather than soak it in?

I know how exhausting it can be at the end of the day when you have a household of small children.  Sometimes, you find yourself dragging once bedtime rolls around, and all you want to do is get through it so that you can sit down and relax a bit.

But, I would like to challenge all of us moms to remember Lori’s story when we find that we are having one of those nights.

Remember that she wanted so badly to be able to continue to put her children to bed each night, but she is no longer here to do it.

Remember that, even when she couldn’t walk up the stairs to get to her children’s bedrooms, she crawled.

Let’s honor her by looking forward to bedtime instead of dreading it.

Let’s honor her by cherishing what she cherished.

Let’s honor her by remembering that she crawled.

lori1

100 Comments leave one →
  1. February 27, 2013 4:13 am

    Thank you for sharing!

    Annamaria

    • Rory Vidler permalink
      February 27, 2013 8:40 am

      Moving story,Lori’s old old Pen pal,from Australia,Rylstone.NSW.

      • Sheila Gill permalink
        October 17, 2016 12:35 pm

        Rory- I think of you often- a
        Some how I never saw your post here- Hugs- Sheila Gill

  2. February 27, 2013 5:48 am

    What an incredible story of love. May God bless us all to love with such passion and grace.

    Thank you so much for taking the time to write this. The story has touched our family tonight and I will pass along to others.

  3. Jill Petty-Bryant permalink
    February 27, 2013 6:54 am

    this is so beautiful, thank you for sharing!

  4. February 27, 2013 11:57 am

    A beautiful memory of someone I met briefly but became a sister. Her grace is something incredibly powerful that wont be forgotten by anyone who knew her.

  5. claudiafauver413 permalink
    February 27, 2013 10:41 pm

    My IBC sister. Lori was very special and will never be forgotten. Hoping I can have the grace that she did in her final days. Love ya, Lori. You are missed.

  6. April Tweedt permalink
    February 28, 2013 1:25 am

    Thank you so much for writing this about my former colleague and friend, Lori. She was an amazing woman and your story honors her and humbles me, both as a physician and a mother of two, young girls. Thank you.

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:18 am

      Thank you, April. Lori’s mom.

  7. February 28, 2013 3:13 am

    This is such an inspiration!

  8. jasonlovelace permalink
    February 28, 2013 3:13 am

    I wish there was a “LOVE” button, because this is an amazing story…

  9. February 28, 2013 4:48 am

    Thank you all so much for the kind words. It was my great pleasure to write about this inspiring woman who many of you knew and loved. I have been truly blessed by her story. (Thank you, Lori!)

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:17 am

      Thank you so much for your beautiful article about our daughter. I cry every time I read it- thank you for telling Lori’s story. We miss her every day. 😢🤗💔💞

  10. kristenchasingblueskies permalink
    February 28, 2013 5:05 am

    Tears.

    May God continue to use Lori’s life and story to strengthen families and hearts towards the Lord.

    Beautiful.

  11. Michelle Ashby permalink
    February 28, 2013 5:43 am

    Thank you for honoring the memory of Lori. She didn’t only express this love to her children and family. She made all of her IBC sisters feel very special too. We miss her dearly.

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:15 am

      Love your comment. Lori is my daughter- she was full of grace and love. 💞

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:19 am

      Thank you, Michelele- Lori’s Mom. 💓

  12. Cindy Walters permalink
    February 28, 2013 5:49 am

    Mother and Child connection is STRONG ❤ I LOVE YOU MOMMA ❤

  13. Holly permalink
    March 1, 2013 2:42 am

    Lori was an amazing woman. Her story inspires me every day

  14. Kara Kent permalink
    March 2, 2013 3:13 am

    So thankful to you for writing this. My sister will always be my inspiration and my hero.

    • Holly permalink
      April 10, 2013 12:20 am

      Does the “3k+” next to to the Facebook icon mean that it has been shared over 3,000 times!? That’s awesome

      • April 10, 2013 12:31 am

        Holly, within a matter of days, the post was viewed over 15,000 times in over a dozen countries. How amazing is that?!?!? I can’t help but think that Lori would be pleased to know that she is still touching and inspiring lives : )

      • Holly permalink
        April 10, 2013 12:39 am

        Wow…. So glad that it has been shared that much. She was a close friend of my sister and I too heard about this story told at the funeral. I still think of it every single night. I now tuck my kids in bed with happy years in my eyes instead of stress.

  15. Teresa permalink
    March 2, 2013 4:11 am

    I am moved to tears by this beautiful story about an amazing soul. Thank you for sharing about your beautiful friend. I am humbled beyond words. God bless her family.

  16. Mrs P permalink
    March 4, 2013 2:06 am

    Thank-you for sharing. It is a timely reminder for me to cherish every moment.

  17. Carla permalink
    March 6, 2013 2:12 pm

    Forever inspired by Lori!

  18. Kara permalink
    June 21, 2013 3:27 am

    Tomorrow marks the 5 month anniversary of my sister, Lori’s death. It meant so much that I could read this again.

  19. Liz permalink
    September 17, 2013 4:09 am

    What an amazing story and women, to show her children the depth of her love by crawling up the stairs to spent the night time sharing she loved so much with her children. A true mother.

  20. October 4, 2013 4:42 pm

    For me this is not about cherishing bedtime, it’s about cherishing life with love in it. Whatever your favorite thing about your children may be, don’t rush through it EVER. Whatever your favorite time with anyone you live, be present in those moments 100%.
    That’s Lori’s lesson to me.
    Bless her soul.

  21. October 4, 2013 6:15 pm

    Amazing , thank you for sharing this powerful post.
    Best,
    Elise

  22. October 4, 2013 10:57 pm

    Deeply saddened for her children, her husband and the rest of her family. Cherish your children, and your time here on earth.

  23. October 5, 2013 2:45 am

    Thank you so much for sharing.

  24. October 5, 2013 3:56 pm

    This really spoke to me today. I cherish bedtime with my five children, yet so often I am so tired by the end of the day and just want to be “done with it”. This is truly understandable for mothers with young children. And yet, how true that if these were our last days on earth, there is nothing that would keep us away from our children and spending those last moments with them. Our time to sit and relax would not even be in our minds. This is not a story that should induce any more “mom guilt” (Lord knows we have enough already), but should just serve as a good reminder and give a little perspective. I most certainly WILL think of the dear mother that crawled up the stairs to be with her children the next time I am having one of “those day/nights” (quite often lately!). What a beautiful story of a beautiful mother and I am so glad that her legacy can touch so many of us.

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:21 am

      You moved me to tears, Rebekah- I am Lori’s mom and am just now finding the courage to read these comments. We miss Lori so very much!💞

  25. October 5, 2013 6:12 pm

    Saw this post through Ann Voskamp’s site…beautiful sharing of an amazing woman! While I’m sad for her children and family that she is gone, she certainly left a legacy for them, and for many others. Thank you for passing this on. I’ve forwarded to my daughter, who has two little ones, and followed your blog. Blessings! ~ Sheila

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:22 am

      Thank you- Lori’s mom. 💞

  26. October 5, 2013 6:14 pm

    PS..the quote you list by Elizabeth Stone is one of my favorites! And absolutely true! ~ Sheila

  27. Gina permalink
    October 5, 2013 8:55 pm

    I have been guilty of rushing my children to bed and now I stop and think of it, I am not even sure why as those lovely end-of-the-day moments are delightful. I thank Lori for reminding me of the blessing I have to be the person who puts my kids to bed every night. God bless her and her family.

  28. Audrey Meyer permalink
    October 5, 2013 11:20 pm

    Thank you for sharing this inspiring and touching tribute. I will remember to try to make this the best day of the rest of my life everyday.

  29. Melissa P. permalink
    October 6, 2013 12:14 am

    That is twice this week God has put a bedtime routine story in front of me. I think He’s trying to tell me to cherish this time with my third and youngest child instead of rushing it. Thank you for following His leading to write this.

  30. Joanie Pribble Davidson permalink
    October 6, 2013 12:42 am

    THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR POSTING THIS ABOUT LORI. WHAT A SAD STORY BUT A BEAUTIFUL ONE ALSO.

  31. October 7, 2013 12:06 am

    This is so touching, so humbling. What a great reminder to all of us to slow down and enjoy each moment. Thanks for sharing Lori’s story.

  32. October 7, 2013 12:34 am

    Aww I am in tears at this very moment! I am so glad someone posted this out there for the world to see…What a lesson for all to learn. For those of us who are moms who have lost their children this is a very moving story and the same lesson can be given in our case as well. Love Love Love this!!

  33. Jennifer McKinney permalink
    October 7, 2013 3:07 am

    I sat here tonight struggling with what to do with my 2 year old that keeps sneaking into my bed after being tucked in. This story came to me for a reason! I cherish the little warm bodies cuddled up next to me & I know that in the years to come those warm little bodies will want less & less to do with me. Instead of worrying about what to do I know now that I will just cherish these nights & however many more I am blessed with!! Thank you for sharing!

  34. Sandra Taber permalink
    October 8, 2013 11:14 pm

    I just read Lori’s story and was touched to my core. I spent time with my sister as she fought a valiant fight with that dreaded opponent cancer. She struggled to go up the stairs. I walked with her and then the day came where we could not allow her to go up or down the stairs. My sister’s children were well grown and able to come to her and give her a nighttime tuck in. But I know she would have crawled if need be to get to a child. a message to Lori’s family. What an incredible gift you have been given. Right now the pain of separation from your loved one is still raw. But someday as you read the letters and the photos she has left you will marvel at the fierceness of her love and how she wanted to stay with you. But she was called and now she waits for you. It is here we live in darkness. She lives in the light. Someday it wont hurt as much to remember.

    May the good lord bless you.

    Sandra Taber
    Mother in law and friend to Kim Doty

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:24 am

      Thank you, Sandra- she left us with so much- she was so full of grace and love. Lori’s mom. 💞

  35. October 18, 2013 12:35 am

    What a heart warming story about a amazing mom and woman. God Bless her family. Thanks for sharing and making us appreciate the small things in life.
    Viola Reindl.

  36. October 22, 2013 9:52 pm

    Thank you for sharing. Much love to her family.

  37. November 10, 2013 10:11 pm

    Thank You for sharing

  38. Olivia Kubetin permalink
    January 22, 2014 7:02 pm

    What an amazing story very heart felt ,God bless her,her husband,and two special children. We will pray for everyone.so they may find peace I their time of need.Thank you for sharing this story.

  39. linda pollock permalink
    January 22, 2014 11:20 pm

    What an amazing,awesome young woman,she has left a legacy to her children that they will never forget thanks to all of her videos,cards and letters. It is so sad to hear of such a young mother have to leave the family that she cherished so much. A lot of us could take a lot of lessons from reading this.

  40. January 24, 2014 3:27 am

    Thanks for sharing this I love your family and im sorry what u guys are going to im going to pass this on to others and this story is sad and im going to pray for your guys family im really sorry

  41. January 25, 2014 12:41 pm

    What a amazing woman! This has touched women all over the world. My prayers are with the family.

  42. Mary D. permalink
    January 26, 2014 5:07 pm

    But I am just wondering… why wouldn’t her husband or hospice workers carry her up? Save her strength for actually reading & tucking in her little ones?

    • January 26, 2014 6:27 pm

      I will let the words of Lori’s husband answer that question. Shortly after I wrote this piece, he responded to it with the following words, “Very well written. I witnessed the crawling and carried Lori up the stairs occasionally before the crawling starting. She was a proud woman and loved being a mother more than anything. Nothing was more important to her than her babies.”

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:29 am

      Mary D. Lori wanted to do this herself. She was never in hospice care and never in bed. She hid her bad days from me( Lori’s Mom) and the rest of us. When I was there, I tried to hep her. She let me walk or crawl up next to her, but wanted to do this herself. Lori was smart, funny, loving, compassionate. Everyone else came first. She mentored women all over the world when her medical practice became too difficult. Love- Lori’s Mom

  43. January 28, 2014 4:55 pm

    How touching. I myself am currently battling cancer and I have a 7 1/2 yr old son. I can so relate to this story. I have begun to purchase birthday cards for him, a journal, ties and socks and such for when he grows up. I keep a journal for him, one for my daughter and one for my husband that I write in. Reminding them how much I love them, giving advice, telling them that my faith is strong even when God’s plan is not my plan. My poor son worries that he will forget how much I love him. I gave him some ideas for how he can remember always!!!! I will cherish bedtime more now. I will take more time to relax and enjoy my son at that time of evening. My condolences to all who are affected by the loss of Lori.
    Sincerely,
    Danielle Gilbert
    tri4dani.blogspot.com

    • January 28, 2014 7:34 pm

      Thank you so much for sharing that. What beautiful things you are doing for your family, Danielle! God bless and keep you. Lifting you up in prayer today…

    • Sheila Gill permalink
      August 23, 2016 2:25 am

      What a beautiful and courageous share, Danielle. God bless you, Lori’s Mom. 💞

  44. Loretta Najarian permalink
    January 30, 2014 5:14 am

    That was one of the most heartbreaking stories I have ever read. This woman loved her family so much, and she certainly had her priorities in the right place. Her courage in the face of certain death is inspiring. Thank you for sharing a truly inspirational moment.

  45. January 30, 2014 2:07 pm

    you should send a copy of your post to the kids to open when they are 16 so they will know how fantastic their mom was!!

    • Kara Kent permalink
      January 21, 2015 1:31 am

      This would be amazing, Chris. I am Lori’s sister, and I have read this article many times. Tears pour down my cheeks every single time. I love how this story shows her love for those “babies” and the incredible strength she had. It is like nothing I have ever witnessed before.

  46. Diane Blake Bollman permalink
    January 30, 2014 2:47 pm

    A true confirmation of how short & precious life is & how we can make the most of every day – whether it’s been good or room for improvement. Her children were so blessed to have such a caring & loving mother & may God bless her family & friends & Lori’s spirit for her time on earth. God is good!

  47. Dawn permalink
    January 30, 2014 8:31 pm

    Inspirational

  48. darlene permalink
    January 30, 2014 8:46 pm

    Thanks for sharing this story…I too will pass it on! Incredible woman!

  49. January 30, 2014 8:49 pm

    Wow so beautiful….I’ll hug my hooligans a little tighter for sure…

  50. toni permalink
    January 31, 2014 4:36 pm

    My father died when I was 7 of cancer. I remember his last few weeks and how sick he was. It is always very disheartening to hear that another child has to have those memories and loss too. I am so glad that with today’s technology and her foresight her children will have her voice and image with a special message from her to them all the days of their lives. Thank you for sharing.

  51. Debbie permalink
    February 1, 2014 12:40 pm

    What a courageous women !! This is such a beautiful but sad story. I pray that they all find peace and keep her sprlirit alive through memories.

  52. joshua ehnert permalink
    February 1, 2014 3:30 pm

    Wonderful story, what a blessing.

  53. Cheryll permalink
    February 1, 2014 9:43 pm

    I do not have little ones living with me anymore. They grew up and left the house for their own households. But my daughter had twins almost four years ago, who were born far too early. While our grandson survived the battle to live, our granddaughter did not. I wish I could have helped her brush her teeth, put her in a little nightie and read her a story. But that will never be and I will never take her twin brother and the other brother that was born a year ago for granted. Every little crazy thing little kids do is so precious. From throwing a full cup on the floor or trying to have cookies for breakfast… those are all things she never did and so we smile broadly when her brothers do. We do it for her.

  54. Jennifer permalink
    February 2, 2014 4:15 am

    Today is my 31st birthday and I could not have asked for a better present. Even though I sobbed and hurt while ready Lori’s story it was a reminder of how fast life goes by. And how we all think we have to get so much done, but do we? I, all to often, rush through putting my one year old down to then try get my two year old down. I used to look at bed time more like a routine: brush teeth, read a few books, pray together and go to bed. I do already cherish my kiddos but now I have a new perspective on the word “Cherish”! Thank you so much for sharing this powerful story. I know many lives will be changed because of it.

  55. adina permalink
    February 5, 2014 1:02 am

    This brought tears to my eyes, the love for ones family doesn’t end at death, with all the letters that she wrote for her family her love will live on. Such a heart warming story many blessing to her family and friends.

  56. February 5, 2014 3:15 pm

    What an amazing example of love and devotion. ❤ ❤ ❤

  57. N. Wallace permalink
    February 6, 2014 5:23 am

    Wow. After reading that, leaving for work in the morning will be next to impossible. It seems so ironic that we must leave the very children we love with all of our hearts to provide for their physical needs. What a crazy, cruel “Catch 22”.

  58. Janell Ann Fields permalink
    February 7, 2014 5:46 pm

    Thanks for the beautiful story.

  59. Pamela Meadows permalink
    February 9, 2014 10:30 am

    This is a beautiful story. How fortunate are those of us who have the privilege of living long enough to raise our children. My greatest prayer in life was to live to get my children raised and God granted me my prayer. Not a day goes by that I take it for granted.

  60. abarana permalink
    February 11, 2014 4:49 am

    Absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing.

  61. February 11, 2014 5:43 pm

    Reblogged this on It's All About Jesus and commented:
    Read this post.

  62. March 22, 2014 10:28 pm

    Reblogged this on Kristin's Perspective and commented:
    A great reminder life is short. To look at our own life3, and see how often we rush through it,…Life is already rushed, why make it go faster?

  63. October 12, 2014 3:27 am

    What an amazing mother. She crawled to put her two little children to bed. Thanks for sharing, GOD BLESS you for sharing this story with me.

  64. January 2, 2015 10:21 am

    You post very interesting content here. Your blog deserves much more traffic.
    It can go viral if you give it initial boost, i know very useful tool that can help you, simply type in google: svetsern traffic tips

  65. Sheila Gill permalink
    August 23, 2016 2:33 am

    I am Lori’s mom. I am so grateful for all of your comments and to know Lori’s story has impacted you. Thank you for sharing. This is so hard for me to read- her death is still such a raw wound even after 3 years. Lori was an amazing daughter, mother, wife, friend and a gifted physician. There is a giant piece of those who loved her missing. We will always love and miss Lori. 💞

    • October 4, 2016 1:41 pm

      Big hugs to you, Sheila. SO many have been touched by Lori’s story! Truly amazing. I’m so thankful that God used ordinary me to share her extraordinary story. May the many wonderful memories you have of her fill you with joy, and may you take comfort in knowing that she is safely in the arms of our Savior ♥

      • Sheila Gill permalink
        October 4, 2016 2:35 pm

        There was nothing ordinary in the your gift to all of us in sharing Lori’s story. It is sadly, amazingly accurately beautiful. Lori’s short life was so impactful. She was a very special woman- born an ” old soul” with wisdom and compassion beyond her years. Her humor, photographic memory, bright spirit, energy and her fiercely superior mommy talents will always be remembered. Thank you for honoring Lori. 💞😘

      • Kara Kent permalink
        September 29, 2017 2:06 am

        I read this at least once a year, and it brings me to tears every time. I can’t tell you how many times people refer to this article when they talk to me about my sister and when they talk about putting their kids to bed. It is made an impact on more people than you will ever know. Thank you for writing it and for keeping it up so that we can continue to share it.

      • September 29, 2017 3:23 am

        I’m so thankful that this post continues to play a small part in keeping Lori’s memory and legacy alive. Big hugs to you, Kara! ♥

Trackbacks

  1. Weekend Reading: March 2, 2013 | Life Your Way
  2. Because of Her - The IBC Network Foundation
  3. A Holy Experience – Only the Good Stuff: Sharing
  4. Life’s Uncertainties: Mothering By Heart | Jeanne Takenaka
  5. Some Faces of Heroism | Jeanne Takenaka
  6. Our Bedtime Routine: A Reaction To "She Crawled" - Moments With Mandi
  7. For That Tired Mother ~ - Christian Chat Rooms & Forums
  8. Weekend Reading: March 2, 2013
  9. She Crawled
  10. She Crawled: Mom’s Final Wish To Spend Every Moment With Her Kids Is A Reminder For All Of Us | Her View From Home
  11. Cancer Made Her Too Weak to Walk Upstairs to Put the Kids to Bed, So She Did This Instead | For Every Mom

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: