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An Unwanted Nightmare

December 8, 2016

Early this morning, far before I normally arise, I felt a little finger tapping me on the shoulder in the darkness.

It was Gracie.

Another nightmare.

But, this time, when I asked her what it was about, she didn’t mention anything about spiders, or monsters, or a bad man chasing her…as usual. This time, in a quivering voice, with her pink bunny and blanket tightly in her grip, she simply said, “I dreamed that you didn’t want me anymore.”


I assured her that we will always, always, always want her, and told her that she could crawl into bed with me.

Adoption is beautiful and amazing and redemptive.

It is.

And I post about those things all the time.

But, along with every adoption story comes a great deal of loss and grief and sorrow. Those things often lie hidden beneath the surface. But, make no mistake. They are always there.

I was reminded of that this morning as Gracie was curled up next to me in my bed, clutching my hand, still reeling from a nightmare that tops all nightmares in her book.

Whether Bryan and I like it or not, there are some wounds that we simply won’t be able to fully heal in Gracie’s heart. But, we know that there is Someone who can.

The Someone we celebrate this Christmas season.

The Someone who came to this weary world to love us, to save us, and to heal our deepest wounds.

Praying that, over time, Gracie will allow Him to do just that.


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