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Panic.

June 14, 2016

Panic.

I can remember having a moment of sheer panic shortly before I left for China to bring Haven home.

It was that moment when I asked myself, “Are we helping or hurting our children by bringing a little boy with a serious medical condition into our family? How will his special need disrupt their lives? Is our decision to willingly bring home an ailing child truly in their best interest?” Those questions sent me into panic mode for a bit.

But, God stepped in and replaced that panic with perfect peace. Perfect peace that comes from knowing that He would take care it. All of it. And I needn’t worry about it any longer.

Last Thursday, I watched as Haven had his first home care visit to have his port flushed. I told the kids they didn’t have to watch. They could just leave the room as the nurse did what she had to do. But, not one of them left the room. In fact, they took my place. I’m usually the one who stands nearby and holds Haven’s hand as his port is accessed. However, on that day, it was his big brothers and sisters. They all gathered around him. Grace held his hand and head. Sidney grabbed his other hand. Jackson was huddled in the corner of the room behind Sid with his eyes covered. But, he was there…because he was worried about his little brother. Morganne was, too. She covered her eyes. But, she was right there, because she wanted to make sure Haven was okay.

Long story short, God has certainly put my fears to rest. Because of the journey that Sidney, Jackson, Grace, and Morganne have had to walk with Haven over these past couple of years, I’ve seen them grow in so many ways. I’ve seen their level of compassion increase. I’ve seen them step up to the plate to help out after Haven’s surgeries. I’ve seen their hearts and minds opened to truths and experiences that they might not have been, if Haven hadn’t come to us.

Bringing a child with a special need into our family has brought its fair share of challenges. But, make no mistake. It has brought its fair share of blessings as well!

Last week, as I watched my kiddos huddled together in our kitchen, in an attempt to comfort and care for their little brother during his time of need, I was reminded of that once again…

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